Stress is a Mess

Friday, Sept. 3

I always stress myself out to much. Sometimes I consider it

"challenging myself" when really I'm just "wearing myself out". I put

myself in Chemistry Honors this year, thinking "this year, *as

everyone says* is the easy year in highschool, so ill just do a

difficult science since i won't be too busy doing anything else". But

I hate chemistry, with a passion. I can't memorize the periodic table,

I don't know what element it Fe, and I definately dislike atom/element

models.

So my first chemistry test comes along and I study hard, and

what do I get? An 84. I was soooo dissapointed, that that night, I

went home and figured out a way to get out of that class, and it was

an easy arrangement. Then I went the next day to my teacher and asked

him if it was possible. Answer: no. The only other alternative was to

change my whole entire routine(schedule) around, and I was not about

to do that. So here I am, in chemistry honors.

All I ask is that you

please pray for me!!!! I'm really hard on myself and I cannot get a B

on my report card! Its.un.accept.able. and on top of chemistry, I

wanted to do stage managing for my school musical in the spring. Now

if any of you know what stage managing is, you know how friggin

difficult that job can be. If you don't know what it is, let me put it

this way: the directors job can be done by monkey compared to the

stage manager. I want to do it, sooooo badly but I also have yearbook,

which might sound easy, but its not- its just as hard as stage

managing. So if I was to put myself under that much pressure=stress, I

would die. But I reeeaallllyyy want to do it, but I know I can't.

Even after all the consideration I've put into it, I'm still not sure what

I'm going to do, but ill let you all know ASAP. Much love!!